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Pynk Talk

#PynkTalk: Can You Still Be Friends With Your Ex?

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As I read the question, my mind is saying no, especially depending on how it ends. There is no way I am going to be besties with the guy that cheated, lied, abused or stole from me. Not gonna happen!

But if we were to have a break up in a hey, it was fun while it lasted kind of vibe, then maybe, just maybe we can be cordial.

Being friends with an Ex can be a really complicated thing. What if they move on, can you deal with it? What if their new mate is not down with this “friendship thang”? What if the two of you find yourself in an intimate relationship again? The confusion of it all!

You know we had to find out what #PynkGirls had to say about the matter:

“I’m still friends with all of my ex boyfriends except one. My soon to be ex-husband on the other hand, probably not since that was domestic violence/abuse related. But I can still pray for him and wish him well. -Monica W.

“I’m friendly with my exes, but we’re not friends. I’m not hanging out with them or anything like that. I think it all boils down to how the relationship ended. Some relationships are just not meant to work out and that’s not your fault or your ex’s.” -Rachel G.

“Yes, but you must be able to accept and agree to friend boundaries on both ends.” -Aleesha C.

“Absolutely as long as the relationship ended on a good note. I am friends with 3 of my exes. The relationship evolved from our friendship but we realized that it would not work due to various reasons.” -Tyra G.

“Probably shouldn’t but I am with some. Sometimes dating a person makes you realize you’re only better as off friends. Again some, not all.” -Sonya B.

“I feel very strongly that they are exes for a reason. Unless you’ve got kids together, there’s no need to be friends. I find, typically when exes remain friends, one or both, still have feelings and that often complicates things for future relationships. Dead it and go!” -Antoinette W.

“Nope. I haven’t been friends with any exes. I honestly think that’s a male thing, it’s in their personalities to want to leave the option open “just in case” unless they are forced by the new woman to leave it alone. When women decide they’re done they are DONE.” -Vanessa B.

“No, if I break up with you I don’t know you.” -Lea’trice C.

“I don’t think it’s healthy to be “friends” with an Ex whom you shared real feelings for. Also, you’re putting your current partner (if any) in a tricky and maybe jealous situation. The only exception is that you’re friends with your baby momma or baby daddy, because it’s a Parental Agreement. An Ex should stay an Ex.” -Sasha M.

“I’ve done that before, but I’m opting not do it going forward, unless we were friends to begin with. A lot of times we get stuck in unhealthy break ups and cycles trying to hold on to those connections.” -Priya W.

“If things ended on a high note, it’s possible. Although it’s difficult to reverse romance down to more platonic dealings. Being a true friend means you will encourage and be happy for them as they engage in new people of interests and try to create a new love experience. Ideally, if you can’t congratulate an ex-lover who’s moving on whilst you may still be single, part ways permanently. There’s nothing worse than a fraudulent ‘friend’.” -Raygon F.

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