Pynk Talk

#PynkTalk: Can Your Bestie Visit Your Partner When You’re Not Home?

Photo courtesy of Instagram: @iam_queenroe

After spending another Saturday night curled up on my couch enjoying a buttery bowl of popcorn, I flicked through the channels and stopped when I came to an oldie but a goody– Cheaters. If you remember Cheaters, it was an action packed reality show of people catching their lovers cheating. You can just imagine the outcome for some of these episodes– violence and broken hearts.

Well, a particular episode caught my attention. The husband was cheating on his wife with her best friend. How did it start, you ask? She came over to visit when her best friend was not there. She was in need of a shoulder to lean on and from that point forward their affair began. Of course, the discovery of their union was intense and caused so much pain for the wife that you could feel it through the flat screen.

That event reminded me of a statement that my mom has been saying for a very long time– “trust no woman.” I can only imagine how devastating it would be for me to find out that my best friend and the love of my life were having an affair totally negating my feelings.

After watching such a disturbing episode, it brought on the question whether or not it is ok for your best friend to visit with your partner when you are not home.

We asked our #PynkGirls and they want in! See what they had to say:

“Yes, my best friend is a man. It’s preferred they get along.” -Priya W.

“Is it ok that I beat her ass? Stay away from my man.” -Octavia M.

“A real friend should know the rules and authority of a family household, so my answer is no.” -Lea’trice C.

“Nope. The only time I ever had any convos with my besties husband without her was to plan her baby shower and she gave me his number for that reason. Otherwise, no reason to be meeting or talking about anything with anyone’s husband or boyfriend.” -Rachel G.

“No. If I’m not there, no need for my friend to be there either.” -Tami C.

“No, only because my spouse and my besties aren’t that close to be just popping up and visiting. Now if she was waiting for me to get home or picking up/dropping off something, or he saw her on the street and gave her a ride, that’s different. I trust my BFF’s but I most definitely trust my husband so I don’t have that issue. I don’t have any issue with my husband being alone with other women, but it has to be warranted and not just on some, “I was in the neighborhood and decided to stop by and have a beer.” That would be awkward and mad suspicious.” -Natoya B.

“Definitely not. They can talk about me when we’re all together. There’s nothing that should be discussed or exchanged otherwise.” -Audris T.

“No, absolutely not. What reason would you have to be visiting when I’m not there? The only reason they should even be having a conversation that I’m not a part of is if they are planning something for me.” -Tiffany G.


“I don’t have an issue with it at all.” -Kristina L.

“Visit with him for what? You are my friend, what visiting do you need to do with my husband when I am not home? Absolutely not.” -Danielle F.

“My bestie and I are really close and when she and my husband clicked, it kind felt like getting the ok from my parents or something. If they find themselves in the same neighborhood and I’m not there, they will sometimes get lunch or stop in to see each other. It makes me really happy when they think to meet up. I would be into us all living in the same house.” -Gretchen D.

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