Love & Relationships

#ThinkSmart: Catch Yourself Before You Catch Feelings

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When it comes to dating we have had many #PYNKTalk conversations on what not to do, how to play the game, how to get out the friend zone, etc. But, when it comes to the one situation that can leave any #PYNKGirl caught up, we have yet to speak on it.

Most of us #PYNKGirls are starting to get the hang of dating and are exploring the many flavors of guys that this Carvel world has to offer. But what happens when you’ve honed in on the one flavor (guy) that you want forever? You can see him being your Monday-Sunday and never getting tired of being wrapped in his arms.

But here’s when reality sets in and smacks you dead in the face because while you’re off planning y’all future together he’s still in the “We are dating phase”. In other words, he’s not ready to settle down and is still out here sampling the many flavors he’s been offered. But, you can’t really be mad at him because you knew what the parameters of y’all “friendship” was before you went off and caught deeper feelings.

So this post is dedicated to every #PYNKGirl trying to catch themselves before they catch feelings or more specifically for those #PYNKGirls like me trying to catch themselves before they catch deeper feelings.

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You know you’ve caught feelings when you catch yourself getting mad when he doesn’t reply to a text within the alotted 3 minute widnow or when you start to stalk his social media accounts wondering who’s the chick leaving heart eyes under his pics (lol). But, it doesn’t set in that you are the only one catching feelings in this friendship because when y’all are together it feels like you are in a committed relationship rather than a friendship. Things seems organic and real and he makes you feel like you are the only one that has his attention.

But the reality of it all is that you are simply dating and he’s great at keeping the distance between you and his other female companions he’s entertaining. So, even though you have high hopes that this will turn into a relationship you need to be aware of the reality of your situation and catch yourself before you catch feelings.

So follow these 5 rules that are sure to keep you in check

  1. Never be eager to communicate or hang out with him. When he sends a text be delayed on your response, it will help you re-evaluate your feelings by not being so available and vulnerable.
  2. Entertain other options to take up more of your time. The reason you are catching feelings is manly in part to the amount of time you spend together. So, go on other dates and just have fun with the thought that you have options.
  3. Avoid doing things that give off the relationship vibe. This is what puts you in a state of being too emotionally invested in this causal relationship.  When you are on a date with him avoid talking about the future and “what ifs.”
  4. Avoid bringing up or thinking about the other females in his life because you will become jealous and consumed with what he is doing when he is not around you. And no one likes an insecure or jealous woman.
  5. The Most Important Rule: Act like a lady and think like a man. Men have the ability to lock away their feelings and be emotionally intelligent when it counts but, for the most part they are good at putting on the poker face. So continue being the lady he likes because that is what got you this far in your friendship but be aware of the vibe you are giving off.

 

Hopefully these rules are helpful with keeping your feelings in check and when in doubt or feeling a moment of weakness hit up this post to remind yourself you are a powerful #PYNKGirl.

 

 

 

 

Photo Credit(s): citifmonline, mpasho.

 

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